Three-two-one, one-two-three, what in the world is bothering me?
Let me start out with some happiness from today.
One: We got a bunch of fruit when the little neighbor girl was going door-to-door selling produce for 4-H. I'm most excited about the crate of grapefruit that I'll "have" to eat now...probably two a day...so that they don't go bad. I've got a pretty giant love for grapefruit.
Two: The boys were spontaneously being adorable after supper tonight. Thankfully my camera was lying right on the table so I could take a few pictures.
Three: Everyone enjoyed their food tonight! BIG success. I made turkey burgers (1lb of ground turkey, one egg, and 1/3 cup salsa) and just told the kids they were "burgers". Emmy took one bite and said "I don't usually like hamburgers but this one is so good! It's the best hamburger I've ever had!" and then I broke the news to them that it was turkey. I figured they'd freak, but they were actually excited. They were also excited about the fruit salad we had as a side dish. SCORE.
and Four: Glee is new tonight and I'm actually home to watch it!!!
Now....the not-so-good part.
It was a really beautiful day today: upper 50's, sunny, not much wind. It felt amazing. So I took the kids and their scooters to Cotton Park (we met up with a friend and her kids there) to run and play. Between the mud, scooter accidents, mud, tripping/falling, mud and mud...it was just a non-stop fiasco. I was so pissed by the time we left.
I really used to have my shit together. Before we had Colton, I had more than one person comment to me on how "calm" I was and how nothing seemed to rile me up. And back then it was true...I was fairly cool, calm, and collected even when things were going South FAST. But now? I feel psychotic all day every day. Having a fourth kid just did something to me.
I don't know if it's just because Colton is a REALLY tough toddler to handle, or if it's just that four kids is a lot of kids for one person to keep track of. But the girls don't require much from me on our outings so that doesn't seem to make sense. Colton is just so headstrong and I'm constantly battling him, day in and day out. I know that toddlers in general like to say "No" but Colton is one of a kind. He's a MEGA toddler....the toddler-to-end-all-toddlers....the biggest tantrum-thrower and the absolute most stubborn and just so exhausting. Completely draining.
Our entire trip today hinged on what direction he wanted to run and whether or not he was actually going to move or whether he was just going to sit firmly in the middle of the bike path, refusing to move at all. The kids get frustrated and if I try to make Colton do something he doesn't want to do that's it. Game over.
We ended up going home way sooner than I'd planned because....well, I'll let you see for yourself.
That little blip in the background is Peyton chasing after Colton
All four kids were heading toward me and as soon as I let my guard down, Colton headed in the opposite direction.
I told him over and over that we couldn't swing...there was too much mud. We looked at the mud...we tested it out. I said "No". He insisted and ended up falling flat into the puddle.
So then, of course, he was ticked because his pants were heavy/wet/cold and his boots were caked with mud but....it didn't really slow him down.
This is everyone --literally every single other person-- from our little party....except Colton. He refused to walk in the same direction that everyone else was going in. (Hudson, Peyton, Emmy, Tegan, Alisha, Annastin, and Talon are all strolling merrily along the bike trail)
Mud, mud everywhere...
Bless you, 9-year-old angel, for staying out of the mud and helping me keep track of everyone.
Curse you, free-spirited dirt-seeking little sprite and your love of all things messy.
(Click the link! Go on...do it!)
At this point, Colton was barefoot (he got his boots stuck in a deep mud puddle and both his feet came right out, causing him to flail around until he fell to the ground yet again, further soaking his pants and his white socks) and trying to climb up the rickety deathtrap slide of doom. So I grabbed him, stripped his clothes off, and stuck him in his carseat.
But God dang if he isn't cute!
Now that the event is over, I'm a lot more zen about it. But while it was happening my brain was going crazy...just too much, too many, too loud, too everything. I don't know what the solution to this is. Xanax? Or just ride it out. Because things will get better, as they always do.